Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] What's up, guys? Well, good morning, church. Happy Sunday.
[00:00:04] We have. Yeah. Amen. We have something incredible to celebrate. We all have made it through the month of January or the year of January. Is it a year or a month? I don't know. So we're one step closer to brighter days ahead, friends. Amen. That sun, you're gonna see it again. June will be here, but no, it's good to see you. And as we are in the month of February, we are spending these next couple weeks, as Tina said, just praying. I believe that at the end of the day, God builds his church and we get to partner with him, but God does it. And so as a church family, as we're in this exciting season, we are just gonna seek God and trust God and ask God. As every step of our journey as a church, God has helped us and met our. That's what we're counting on as we go forward. And the best way to express that trust is, I believe, through prayer and through seeking him. And so I just want to encourage you. Yeah. Take that card. Be praying for our church. Be praying through those requests on there. And it's going to be exciting to see God move in our church. So thank you for doing that. And today we're starting a new sermon series. So the month of February, we got Valentine's Day, you know, hope that you got good plans lined up. But we're going to talk about love, and we're going to talk about this idea of love matters, that, number one, love does matter. You know, what's interesting is that no matter where people are coming from and what they believe about God, again, that's kind of one of those interesting things we all agree on that love is really important in life. You can have great stuff, you can go to great places. But if our relationships are hurting, nothing can really replace that, because that's how important love is. But love is something we have to really learn how to do. We have to learn how to love the people that are closest to us. Parents, you gotta learn how to love your kids. It looks different with each one. Amen.
[00:02:22] We've gotta learn how to love each other, and we have to learn how to love God. And so what this series is, we're gonna look through the book of First John, and it's actually all about this. So for the month of February, we'll be going through that, and I think it'll be exciting. But let me pray for us. Father, thank you for this time. Thank you for this opportunity to, Lord, think about what love looks like and how we can grow in it. And Lord, I pray that you would teach us your way. I pray, Father, that you would give us the grace of forgiveness and cleansing. And Lord, we could just experience that through the practice of confession. So bless us today, help us, guide us as we think about these things. In Jesus name, amen. Well, many years ago I heard this podcast and one of the guys on there was talking about this week long experience that he went to. And the experience was called the Bob Hoffman Institute. I'd never heard of this, but as he was telling the story, it captured my attention. And so I kind of looked into it. And basically it's a week long, intensive kind of counseling thing. And it's a week long, very focused, very intense. But it's all built on this idea of what they call negative love syndrome. And what Negative love syndrome. Or at least this is the best I understand it. I've only googled these things. I haven't been there. But when I was looking at it and it was catching my attention, what basically it said was that we all learn unhealthy ways to give and receive love.
[00:04:07] Like throughout life we learn the wrong ways that I have to do this or be this to receive love. And some of these things I think I have to do or be are not actually healthy or good. You with me on this? And so then it drives our life in ways that aren't productive, that aren't good, that aren't healthy. And then the same way, sometimes we give love in the wrong sort of ways. And so this whole deal is kind of spending a week long of just unpacking that and digging at it. And as I was just looking at it and trying to understand what it was, it just occurred to me like how crazy it is that we all want love, we all want to get love, but we're not great at figuring it all out.
[00:04:55] We all desire it so deeply and it's such an important part of life. But yet as you go on the journey of trying to build that in your life and make it, it's a lot harder in practice. Anyone resonate with that? And what we see in the Bible is that actually the place where we are meant to learn how to love. What love looks like, what it is, and how it operates in our life is from God.
[00:05:27] And that God is that beginning point that we all really need.
[00:05:33] And by connecting to him and understanding what love is from him, it enables us to love each other a lot better. So that's what First John is about. And I'M going to just begin today, and we're going to look at chapter one of First John. And let me read this to you. I absolutely love this chapter. It is so powerful. So I'm gonna read the whole chapter to you. I hope you're comfortable. You seem just awake and energetic and alert. Like, I feel like your synapses are firing. Just. You're ready to go. So tune in to me as I read this to you. Here's what it says. That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked upon and have touched with our hands concerning the word of life. Now, here's what's interesting. This book was written by John the apostle. And John was probably the youngest of the original 12 people that Jesus called to follow him. So he was kind of, you know, he was the youngest. I'm guessing he probably got hazed a little bit and picked on and stuff like that. And he. And at this point, he's writing this, and now he had spent a lifetime reflecting and thinking about his experience with Jesus and what that all meant. I mean, John's probably now an old man. Decade after decade has passed by the time he's writing this. And he begins, and he says, hey, what I'm telling you about is what I've experienced. It's what I've literally seen, what I've heard. This isn't just theory.
[00:07:11] This is my story.
[00:07:14] And he says, this life was made manifest, and we have seen it and testify to it and proclaim to you the eternal life which was with the Father and was made manifest to us. That which we have seen and heard, we proclaim to you so that you too may have fellowship with us, so that we could have a deeper, more meaningful relationship. He said, this is why I'm telling you all this.
[00:07:40] And he said, indeed, our fellowship is with the Father and with His Son, Jesus Christ. And we are writing these things so that our joy may be complete.
[00:07:50] This is the message we've heard from him and proclaim to you that God is light in Him. There is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. If we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he's faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. That is one of the most beautiful verses in all the Bible.
[00:08:35] If we say we've not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us. Now, there's a lot to unpack in these verses, but I just want to hit some of the highlights and the big ideas. And John begins. And he begins with his experience.
[00:08:52] And he said, I've encountered that which was from the beginning. Use this really cool language. In other words, he's saying, I've literally. I've touched the thing that is the beginning of all things.
[00:09:12] I've had an experience with what we might say today with the transcendent. I mean, what is beyond this world, beyond our bills and beyond everything we can see and beyond. I've touched and I've experienced, and I know what is beyond all of this, he says, And I want to tell you about it, because I want you to experience it, too. And you know what I find fascinating just about that is that we all, just as human beings, we long to know that which was from the beginning. We long to experience the transcendent. And you actually. You have to turn that off at some point in your life to avoid it. Naturally, we're wired. Like, we're wired for God. We're looking for him, we're seeking Him. But if we're gonna get away from that, you actually have to turn it off. But it's in you because we long to know it. Just this week, my daughter Abby, we were just talking, and she was looking at some pictures from years ago. And my girls, whenever they see pictures, they're always like, where was I? That's all that they're concerned about.
[00:10:36] What's the first thing you do when you look at a picture? Where am I in it? That's what they do, too. But a lot of the pictures, they're not in it. And so she wasn't in this because she wasn't born yet. It was at our old house, and my oldest was. Was just born. And she was, like, very intrigued by this. And so she said, daddy, where was I? And I said, well, Abby, you were not born yet, so you weren't there. And I could tell, like, her wheels were turning. She's like, okay, but where was I?
[00:11:09] And so, you know, when you don't know what to say, you just go back to what you said before. You weren't born yet.
[00:11:17] And, like, again, like, her wheels are turning. You know, she's like. I could tell, like, she's really trying to, like, comprehend all this. She's like, okay, I wasn't born, but where was I?
[00:11:30] And so I was like, you know, starting to scramble a little bit. And I was like, well, you were with God.
[00:11:38] And she was like, okay. Like, wheels kept turning. All right, I was with God, but where was I?
[00:11:46] And I look over to Allie. Cause we're in the kitchen, and I'm like, mom, bail me out here.
[00:11:54] And she's clearly never seen Band of Brothers. Because she totally left me behind out there.
[00:12:00] And I could see the look on her face. She's like, all right, Pastor, you're up, buddy.
[00:12:06] You're up. Let's see what you're made of.
[00:12:09] And it wasn't pretty.
[00:12:12] And finally, finally, like, we kept going through this, you know, and finally I said. I said, you were in the mind of God. And then I left the room. Cause that was it. I was like, I'm done.
[00:12:27] But it was so I could tell, like, she wanted to understand what is beyond this world.
[00:12:34] Like, she. And it was like, it was a real drive in her, and it's a real drive in all of us.
[00:12:41] And again, you can turn it off. And maybe there's been times in our life where we've tried to turn it off. And we're like, okay, I'm just avoiding the idea of God. I'm gonna just kinda try to close this off. But then at some point, you're like, I just can't do it. Because we all are wired for him. We're wired to know him, and we're wired to be in a relationship with him. And there is always that pull on our life. And John is saying, hey, what your soul is searching for, I've experienced. I know it, and I want you to know it, too. And he uses this great phrase. He says he is the word of life. And this is such a beautiful phrase because this word that is used for word. You follow me on that. The word that is used for word is actually this idea of logic, of kind of understanding. It's kind of the basic foundation. So he's saying that in my relationship with Jesus, in my experience with Jesus, here's what he's saying. Life now makes sense.
[00:13:56] That there is now a way that I look at everything in life and it gives it in order.
[00:14:05] That makes sense. And I want it to make sense to you.
[00:14:11] And, you know, I was talking with a friend recently, and we've been friends for a long time. And he was telling me that kind of God makes sense in his life now. And it's Kind of this new development. It's really exciting. I love talking to him about it. And he was telling me the other day, he just said. He said, you know what? Now I see God everywhere in my life. And I don't know how I didn't see it before, is it now. It's like, I just don't know how.
[00:14:44] And this is what John is saying to us. John is saying, hey, I've experienced God, and now when I look at everything in life, there's a new logic to it. The old logic never really worked out that great, but there's a new logic that makes it make sense in some ways. And it's changing me and it's changing my relationships. He says, and I want it to change you, too. Because here's what Christianity is at its core, it's not just a theory, it's not just a bunch of ideas. It's not religious practices. But it's an experience with Jesus Christ that fundamentally changes you.
[00:15:30] And that's why no one can have faith for you. It's got to be an experience that you and I, we each encounter and understand and relate to him in a way that makes us have a different logic of life.
[00:15:47] And I bet many of us here today could say, I know what John is talking about.
[00:15:54] And many of us today could probably say, well, I didn't hear Jesus, I didn't see Jesus, but he is as real to me as this table right here. And what he's done in my life is as real as anything else.
[00:16:12] And it's given me a new look. And this is what John is saying. He's saying, as I have experienced him, it's changed how I relate to people, how I relate to you. And I want that for you and for your relationships. See, the beginning point of love is connecting to God.
[00:16:38] I can never love the people well in my life until I connect to God for myself first. That's the beginning point. Otherwise, there will always be confusion. There will always be a lack of ability. There will always be an emptiness. And this is where John is going. He said, this is my experience. He says, but this is a message you need to understand if you're going to connect with God. He says, you have to understand this message. And here's what it is, just verse five, he says, this is the message.
[00:17:09] So I want this relationship for you. I want you to experience it. I want you to know it. I want you to see how it changes things. But you have to understand this message. And here's what it is that God is light.
[00:17:23] And in him there is no darkness at all. God is light. Think about just a couple days ago when the sun was out. Remember that? And just you remember how good you felt.
[00:17:38] Remember, like, you just walk into places and people, like, looked alive. It looked just like. Remember that.
[00:17:46] It was a long time ago.
[00:17:49] But there's something clearly transforming about light, isn't there? Light is the source of life. It's the source of energy. It's the source of all these things, light. And John says, God is light.
[00:18:07] Everything good in your life and in this world, if you trace it back its origins is God.
[00:18:16] Everything that makes you smile, everything that brings you joy, everything that feels. If you follow all of that back, the origin is God.
[00:18:28] And it's pure. And there is nothing unrighteous. There is nothing unjust.
[00:18:34] He is completely pure and morally good. He says, God is light, and in him there is no darkness at all.
[00:18:44] Here's the problem, though.
[00:18:47] In you and me, there is darkness, isn't there?
[00:18:53] In fact, if we are honest, we could look at any time in history, in any part of our world, and we could see some pretty horrible darkness.
[00:19:08] No matter what, any parts of our world. We could zoom in. We could zoom in to places today and we could see darkness that would make our stomach turn. Amen. And all through human history, this is true.
[00:19:23] And there's so many different epics of history where it's just appalling and apparent. But here's what I also know. I don't have to look across the globe or look across the US or even look across the street to see darkness.
[00:19:42] Because I can see it very real in myself.
[00:19:46] And there is a lot more of it than I would like to admit anyone else.
[00:19:53] I can see more of my share of it just within my own heart.
[00:20:01] And I can see it sometimes and I can know it's there and I can wanna move away from it. Like, all right, man, I'm gonna just. I'm gonna be super dad today. And then super dad dies a early death and that jerk comes out. Amen. But it's like, no. I knew it. I didn't wanna go to this darkness, but I went there. I'm gonna be super husband today. Well, he doesn't even wake up and get out of bed. I had all the intentions, but he's dead on the side of the road somewhere.
[00:20:33] There's a lot of darkness in our heart. But what John is saying, but God is nothing like you and me.
[00:20:42] It's not that he's just better than us. He's in a category completely different than us.
[00:20:51] There is no darkness. He is light. And so then John begins to ask this question. And I don't know if you've thought about this question, but it's a really important one to think about today.
[00:21:03] Basically, the question is this. How can people marked by darkness be in a relationship with a God of light?
[00:21:12] That's the question.
[00:21:14] How can people who like you and me, there is real darkness in us.
[00:21:21] How can we connect to a God who has no darkness in him at all?
[00:21:28] Now, sometimes we try to answer this question on our own.
[00:21:32] And I think some of the answers that we arrive at are, well, okay, I have a sense that there's darkness in me. And I have a sense that God is light. And so my way of dealing with the problem is I'm going to avoid God.
[00:21:46] I'm going to just move away from him because I anticipate the tension. I anticipate the. The conundrum of this. So I'm just going to avoid it. Or the other way is we say, well, I guess is there really that much darkness in me? Like, I don't know, have you met my cousin like that, there's darkness in him. I just got, you know, there's just a little shade in me.
[00:22:11] And we kind of start to play those games and we think, well, maybe, maybe they're the God of light. Maybe I'll be okay because I kind of. I've got it mostly together and I can keep getting it together. But John says, here's what John says. He says, if you think that's the way you deceive yourself and the truth is not in us.
[00:22:33] He says, no, we got a real problem here.
[00:22:38] So what do we do? And this is where this chapter goes. And I just want you to look at this and I want you to hear this out. More of this is going to be explained. But. But it's so powerful. Here's the way he says, if we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. In other words, I can't clean up my act enough to be able to live in the presence of the God of light.
[00:23:06] I can't fix myself. I can't undo enough things in my life. John says, I can't do that. He says, but look at verse nine. This is the key. But if we confess our sins, he's faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
[00:23:32] He is the God of light, but he forgives us and he cleanses us.
[00:23:40] And so the way that people marked by darkness live with a God of light and live in a way that he transforms us and transforms our relationship, John says, is part of that experience is the practice of confession. Now, I want to talk about this for a minute. And when you hear that word, confession, don't think about somebody in the police station with the bright light on them saying, did you do this? Yes or no? Because that's often what we think about confession. We understand it only as a way to be declared guilty or to be punished or to be rejected or isolated or something like that. And so when we think about confession, we think about all these things. But here's what John says. He says when we confess to God, we experience not rejection, not punishment, not all right, I'm gonna put the scarlet letter on you now. Cause you finally came clean. But here's what he says we experience. We experience forgiveness in cleansing.
[00:24:54] See, in other words, what John is saying is saying the problem is not the darkness.
[00:25:01] The problem is our unwillingness to acknowledge the darkness. You get me? The problem is not that we are broken people. Because God says, I can forgive that.
[00:25:14] I will cleanse that. Jesus has done more than enough for you to take that away forever. The problem is that we don't see our need for him and that we can be unwilling to own it. You with me on this?
[00:25:34] But John says. But he says, but that's the key. It's hard to admit you're wrong, isn't it? Or maybe I have a hard time with it.
[00:25:44] My wife really has a hard time. No, I'm just kidding. Just kidding. Babe. She's not here. Just kidding. Just kidding. Just kidding. Just kidding. Just kidding.
[00:25:52] But, yeah, but if you think about it for a second, that's really where the growth is in our life. That's really where the change is. There's a great book that came out years ago called Extreme Ownership. And it's not written from a Christian perspective, but the whole idea is basically confession here. And the idea is that in life, we're always looking at the people around us. We're like, oh, if they did this better or that better, then everything would be better and smooth. But what the main idea of that book is is, say, don't start in that place.
[00:26:33] If you're struggling in marriage, don't start with what your spouse needs to do different when you're struggling with the kids. Don't start with what they need to do different when we're struggling. His point is, no, start with yourself and Say, what do I need to do different? All right, they're not listening to me. My kids aren't listening to me. Well, am I communicating to them in a way that they can hear? That's what the whole idea is. And when we do that, it really is actually empowering. And one of the things that the New Testament says again and again as followers of Jesus, you're a follower of Jesus, that the mirror will serve you so much better than looking out the window and shaking your finger at other people so many times. The New Testament says, all right, if you really want things to change, begin with yourself.
[00:27:29] Jesus says, hey, before you pick the speck out of your brother's eye, why don't you take a second and get that honking log out of your own? Amen. That's my translation of that.
[00:27:45] But you get the idea, and again, that's, like, affirmed again and again and again that if I allow God to deal with me, and I am humble and open to that, then I don't really need to worry about how God is dealing with everyone else. You with me on this. But you know what's much easier is to worry about how God's dealing with everybody else. You're like, that's where your mind wants to go. That's where my mind wants to go. And this is what John is saying. John's saying, this is the problem.
[00:28:15] This is the problem with us is that we look at the mirror and we're like, nope, I'm smashing that thing, because I don't want to go through that. But he says, but that's the way.
[00:28:27] That's the way that you and I begin to experience the real forgiveness and grace of God. Because he's saying, look, you're forgiven. It's there. Confession is how you experience it in your life. See, some of us, we're carrying the mistakes of our past. And believe it or not, the way to feel God's experience is through this practice, through confession, to say, all right, Lord, I just.
[00:28:57] I want to open my heart and be vulnerable with you about it. You know what the word confession actually means?
[00:29:04] It means to say the same thing, to say the same thing. Here's how it works. It means that when we open our heart before God, and the Lord says, all right, son, daughter, you're really, like, prideful about this. And you know what confession is? It's when I say, lord, you're right to say the same thing or to agree, Lord, you're right, would you forgive me? And would you cleanse me?
[00:29:40] Because God doesn't need our acknowledgement. This is not for God. This is for you.
[00:29:47] Until I own it, I cannot move forward.
[00:29:52] I'll be stuck in it and I'll keep, like, tripping up on it. But the beauty of this is the Lord saying, look, I've forgiven you. Like, this isn't about humiliation.
[00:30:03] This isn't about rejection. In fact, this is actually about the exact opposite. This will deepen your relationship with me, but this is about cleansing.
[00:30:16] This is about growing. This is about moving forward. I think in my best moments with my kids, my best moments, and these are few and far between in the season. But in my best moments, when. When they kind of do something that you know is really like a bigger deal, like they knock each other, punch each other in the face or something like that, you know, something like, that's like. It's a little more than the average shenanigans. I will. In my best moments, I'll sit down with them and I'll say, abby Emory, look me in the eye. And they hate it.
[00:30:59] They're just like. Their whole body has, like, a reaction. They're like. It's like they're stuck in the force. But I'm so annoying about it because you gotta get your swings in as a parent when you can, you know, you drive me crazy. Yeah, I'm gonna abuse my power a little bit here and drive you crazy too, sometimes. So is that wrong? I'll confess that later, but. So I'll be like, hey, look me in the eye. Look. And finally, like, it'll be like they'll start to just get one eye and I'll just keep going. Nope, look me, I need two of them.
[00:31:34] And then I'll say, you know, I'll try. And these are my best moments. I'll say, hey, listen, Daddy loves you. I'm not mad at you. Nothing will change my love for you or our relationship. But tell me what happened and you know, and then you gotta pull it out of em with all your might.
[00:31:56] But my heart as a dad is not to embarrass them. It's not to humiliate them. It's not to shame them. It's for their growth.
[00:32:08] It's'cause, like, I want them to understand, I want them to learn.
[00:32:13] I want to steward the time that I have with them in the wisest possible method.
[00:32:20] And nothing's going to change my love for him. And parents, you're all with me on this. Amen. You say, hey, look, there's no deal breakers, but let's talk about the hard stuff so we can move forward. Let's talk about the hard stuff so we can grow, so we can become healthy. And we do that as imperfect parents. But our Heavenly Father is perfect. And his love for you and me is so great. So, look, I love you. Christ has forgiven you. Nothing is going to change that.
[00:32:58] But let's be real with each other so we can grow, so we can change, so our relationship can deepen.
[00:33:08] And I want you to know, whatever you're struggling with and I'm struggling with, the key to it is to bring it into the light.
[00:33:18] I know we want to keep it in the darkness, but it's actually safer in the light because that's where God's forgiveness and healing and grace is for you and me today. Let's pray.
[00:33:33] Heavenly Father, we worship you. We honor you. We acknowledge, Lord, that you are the God of light, that in you there is no darkness at all.
[00:33:45] But, Father, we also realize there is darkness in us.
[00:33:52] And, Lord, we pray for your forgiving grace to meet us in it. We pray for your cleansing grace.
[00:34:01] We pray, Lord, that we can just go to you in confidence, even in our mistakes and failures, knowing that it will not destroy the relationship, it will actually strengthen it.
[00:34:16] And, Father, I pray we could see the power of your love for us and it would change how we love others.
[00:34:25] Would you help us? Would you guide us? Would you bless us in this? In Jesus good name we pray. Amen.
